Knot my cup of coffee

After the pox kind of ‘chickened’ out and the PGP decided to try their luck in killing me with the class schedule, only now could I come up with a title punny enough to make me write. Well, that and the fact that few of my friends got engaged/married/committed recently. In addition to that I want huge quantities of coffee (that would increase the PAT of Nestle’s Nescafe division) to help me survive the week ahead!

Ever since I saw Raavan, I have been toying with the idea of marriage as an extension of Stockholm Syndrome. No, I’m not exactly someone who goes around cracking marriage jokes or make fun of louuu but the idea kind of seemed to hold some appeal. When 2 of my good friends got engaged (not married), I asked what changed now? And for some reason the response was something like there’s no going back now! In the Indian value system (not picked up from TMI, will talk later) the marriage is taken seriously and for all optimism that goes with it, it is a lifelong contract. You break out of marriage and unlike the US where your status is “available-again” (Hey Angelina Jolie and Bradd Pitt might be available soon!) the Indian society tags you with a “divorcee”. Now here I need to make it clear, I’m not thinking too pessimistically :)

So, thinking a bit more objectively and trying to follow the value system, you want to be ‘sure’ that the person you want to spend the rest of your life with is someone whom you are not gonna have a problem with for not retuning a couple of calls or for forgetting to get the milk in the morning! How do you test that? Isn’t it more a, I know too geeky, but a function of time? Relationships evolve with situations, what the OB guys call critical incidents. So a guy might remember the days his wife went late to her office to accommodate his board meetings and a wife might remember the early morning bed coffees he used to so lovingly make. They also evolve with bad things, like the time the guy cracked a mother-in-law joke with his peers or the lady cribbed how the guy never bothered about if the house is clean. But come-on, even the fin guys out here couldn’t anticipate events in future and based on their best guess prepare ‘pro-forma’ sheets! So in their language, the terminal growth rate is actually the after marriage love :P

So, given the risks involved, your arranged marriage seems more of a risk than your love marriage ain’t it? Actually, I agree am no expert, but the love marriage kind of cuts down the time to ‘court’, the fun part of finding out stuff about your parent’s recommendation that is the most colourful part. Again, u like it or not, the cycle sets in of making adjustments given the terms of the contract. And hence is born a ‘love’ so different from the love before marriage.

I feel a bit old talking about marriage, but then guys my age are actually getting married! For the female friends of mine, whose families should be sent to capture Dawood, given their search expertise, wish they have the most fun in the courting part :) As for me, it depends on the time like 4 years from now and the people in my life then.

Coming to the coffee part of it. Although I can connect this to my previous topic, I won’t. After I wrote about GJC, readers of my blog (yes, u 6 :P) have kind of come to the conclusion I’m an addict. Strangely, I’m like a camel when it comes to coffee. (no, I do not store it in my hump) I can go without coffee for days together (months together when I had a bet), if I can’t get a good coffee! For all the guys and girls who are giggling at the statements, I mean the one made with caffeine.

Thanks to a schedule that runs from 9 to 8 every day followed by cases and articles to read, coffee has been a lifeline more than a fad. The only solace has been the TMI (Technology Management and Innovation) course that has almost got the entire batch scurrying to read the articles so they can participate in the class discussions (not DP). I’ve run out of superlatives to describe the course and the discussions on twitter. And its not just me.

In some ways, the sickness, recovery and more sickness kinda situations have made me kind of numb to expectations from people – both ways. But then I never gave a damn most times anyway. And so here’s wishing myself luck to the world of coffee, marriage and cynicism (hopefully in that order) :P