Clonk!! Hammer.. Where did my tongue go? shit i was born without a larynx(or was it pharynx?)!!! ok, i seem to have moved my head in the affirmative for something! then why is she still talking?? that name where have i heard before?! oh ya its mine..
This was an imaginative thought process that could possibly explain the state of those guys who claim to be "men of few words", while all the people who know them simply seem to feel gifted are the deaf not to be able to hear these guys! Well i for one, personally know such people and the other extreme too that i might deal with later in the blog. Now these people, if gifted with wit or even a sense of timing, u feel sorry for them. Cos it somehow seems to build a kind of complex that makes them abusive of anyone normal. Let me tell u before hand all this concerns only the species of the uncommitted male.
Now what is that factor that makes them express such tongue tiedness. Some possible explanations i can dish out. Light travels faster than sound and so u never know how stupid one is till they open their mouth(nothing original). Having had to put up with themselves over years, they might have a clear picture as to the crap that emanates. And when it is all about projecting a favorable image (even if only to non-males) the brain might refuse to let the tongue muscles contract or expand. If biological conspiracy isn't what is responsible, then the bollywood and all other woods in India (and abroad) suggest an extreme shy attitude or the craziness they call pyar, mohabbat and what not?!! Well most of these specimens are unabusive.
But what about the abusive ones? I think for this u have to blame charles darwin for his theory of evolution that traces the family tree to apes and animal planet that runs such documentaries on the apes, which us guys tumble upon in the immediate need to change channels.(ahem) When a male ape finds itself inadequate to compete with other male apes, it seems to scream, attack and resort to indulging in all sorts of things like bossing around, throwing fecal matter (thank god the first part didn't sink in too much) and becoming extremely offensive. That’s why i say don't land on animal planet! My sympathies go out to such guys.
Now in the other end of the spectrum lie specimens, who make a fool out of themselves drooling so unaware of the surroundings and then come back to boast of their conquests. Well again, what can be going through their mind, when they could not even manage a hi to the entire gang when with a female, who mostly treats them as jesters? When all they talk about is talk about their ex crushes (or current failed attempts) and ask about class timings or exams and then come back to the gang and say they were simply flirting with a 'chic'? A tough call. For they gain not anything but some encouragement from girls who take sympathy on them and laugh at the stupidest attempts made at jokes that they take a liberty in assuming more of the same is all they want. After all projection seems to be the order of the day.
But guess these people form a minority of the guys. Cos there is a majority of guys, for whom the conquest ain't all and their attempts are projected without exaggeration. i have lost track of all the names they coin, like metrosexual, ubersexual and stuff that don't mean a thing. Guess all that matters is a steady head that understands manliness is much more horizontal than erect and doesn't go open mouthed at any casual or platonic conversation with the other gender. So here's to us guys!
